Tyranny of Distance – Windsor

Finding a good lunch destination around the Chapel Street precinct can be a daunting experience. One must have their wits about them when making the crucial decision of which cafe to place your bottom in. There are a plethora of overpriced, commercial and frankly down right unappealing spots to grab some lunch on/around possibly Melbourne’s most iconic Street. Thankfully, for your sake, you are reading The Chommery, which will bestow upon you the power of knowledge. With this knowledge you can eat happy & eat happy you will.

The crazy crew behind The Chommery would recommend Tyranny of Distance, located on Union Street, Windsor as a super spot for a feed. Just look how happy the bloke in two different shoes is standing out front! Carefully placed, just away from the frantic Chapel street, Tyranny is conveniently open from breakfast to dinner every day of the week. We headed on down here on a lazy Sunday morning after we avoided some of the berserk crowds we noticed at all the well-known ‘hot-spots’ in South Yarra and Prahran. If you are looking to relax and skip the up-to hour long queues then Tyranny is a solid choice.

Let me be the first one to tell you that it’s preferable to sit in the room pictured above. When the room that is photographed is full, often the staff will direct you towards an atmosphereless, dark and dingy over-flow room. I will not eat/drink at Tyranny unless I’m placed in the room above. The main dining room is open plan and spacious. You can smoke in there with good ventilation, and last but not least, those funky gas cylinders placed all around the shop are very funky.

Some teas and coffees to start? Why not. Soy Latte (left @$3.50) and Chai Latte ($4.00). Personally, I am not a fan of the soy milk used at Tyranny. Sorry to sound like a massive fuss pot, but the Nature’s Own Soy brand tastes terrible. I drank it, but didn’t love it. The chai Latte arrived nicely presented on an Olde English tray using loose leaf chai and a side of honey.

I usually prefer the table orders an array of different and exciting dishes when The Chommery is considering writing up an eatery. On this day, we could not help but order a very egg-fuelled assortment of breakfasts. You can not blame us though, ey! Scrambled eggs with mushroom, cured salmon and flatbread ($14.50). Totally adore the homemade flatbread here. I think everyone does. The salmon was fresh, the shrooms were buttery and flavoursome and the scrambled eggs were fluffy with  little hints of parsley.

Poached eggs with avocado, cured salmon and flatbread ($15.50). Very generous serving of avocado – nearly a full one. Can you ever be served too much? Eggs poached perfectly. Once again – no complaints from here. The flat bread can be used as a sponge – like friend to mop the egg yolk up!

Scrambled eggs with grilled tomato, spinach, mushrooms, and housemade flatbread ($17.50).

Spanish style baked eggs with chorizo, roasted capsicum, smoked paprika, tomato compote and sweet onion ($13.50). I would describe this as a great replica of an Israeli style dish called Shakshuka – which I really love. On the topic of love, I loved this dish t0o. I rated the big chunks of juicy chorizo and sweet potato pieces floating in the stew as well as the eggs cooked in a different way. Besides the fact I burnt my entire mouth when I started eating, I thoroughly enjoyed my meal.

I have eaten at Tyranny many times. An affordable and easily likeable dinner menu is on each night as well. The lunch offerings are pleasant too, with many flat bread varieties (can’t get enough of that flatbread). It’s not the warmest inside the Tyranny, so I would suggest rugging up and heading down for B/L or D (breakfast, lunch or dinner). Even the late night beer or wine may take your fancy as well.

No need to keep your distance from Tyranny of Distance.

The Important Details…

Cuisine: Regular cafe fare

Noise: Gentle buzz

Bookings: Possible but hard to organise

Suitable for: Most types

Dress: Funky as you feel

Price: $20 per head

My View: Groovy cafe – Great flat bread!

Address: 147 Union Street, Windsor

Phone: (03) 9525 1005

Website: http://www.tyrannyofdistance.com.au/